One step forward, two back!

16/04/2015 3 By drnadeem

Grief is such a personal thing! Acceptance of loss is such a strange jigsaw. I had, I thought completed the puzzle, beautiful it looked. I was about to stow it away in the attic of my mind to gather dust unaware of the missing pieces and the dark gaps. A kindly counselor shone a torch and what I had thought was acceptance turned into attempts at hiding behind a facade. The wound had not filled, only a thin weak scar had formed over a festering sore. The foundation on which my acceptance had been built crumbled and landed with a thump on the lower floor of depression and despair, making me realise that there is much work to be done.

” Lost her three years ago” she said, perhaps rightly so.

What is death?

Isn’t it a being, relinquishing a vehicle, a cover, a body to step into a different dimension? We have neither seen this dimension, nor experienced it nor have a we got reliable consistent proof. But does the absence of proof mean non-existence?

It is rather rare and difficult to contact the departed. Skeptics would dismiss off hand any claims of mediums and seances. But is there a grain of truth in such claims?

Logical Positivism argues for acceptance only of observable facts as perceived by our five senses as the only positive evidence of proof. But do our feeble senses, despite our attempts to improve nature with marvelous technological advances, give us all the knowledge of everything out there?

” There are more things in the heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy”, says Shakespeare in Hamlet.

Recently driving to work, with melodious classical music on the radio, dreaming and fantasizing I was rudely brought to my senses when the brakes failed! Fortunately the brakes finally responded to the frantic pressure of my shaking foot, and the car rolled to halt without a mishap. Later a colleague on hearing this said that whenever she is in her car she feels the presence of her dad protecting her. Was my mother’s spirit looking out for me and saved me on the day? I believe she was!

Is it an irrational thought, a delusion?

At other times, meditating, especially at times of great mental turmoil, I have strongly felt the presence of my dad, who died 25 years ago, calming me, guiding me and showing me the way. My logical mind fights against this, pointing out that it is only my mind playing tricks on me. But how do I account for the peace I feel, the guidance I get?

I feel that the departed ones are not completely deleted but the echos of their presence are felt if only we can trust our intuition, feelings and emotions and not dismiss off hand our experiences. They have only stepped out of a vehicle to perhaps journey in another dimension.

Did I lose my mother three years ago?

Distance, physical and emotional, diminished communication and demands of work and my own family did certainly create a gulf and perhsps I did not make enough effort to bridge this gulf. So it is true that it was a partial if not a complete loss. Regrets now, are of no avail.

It’s better not to fall into this trap. It is rather hard if not impossible to connect with our loved ones after they have departed and are off on their own travels in unknown dimensions. However it’s not difficult to connect and strengthen our connections and communications while they are still alive. It’s easier when we are travelling in the same dimension than in parallel worlds.